Spring in Tennessee

There are few things more beautiful than Tennessee in the spring. Dan and I love to see all the spring colors erupt in blooms and blossoms and watch the grass get greener and more lush. It is our favorite time of year. A time of new beginnings. Dan likes to plan his year from January to January but I find that from spring to spring does it for me! I want to "clean house" each spring. That does not mean just cleaning out closets and cupboards and wiping down cobwebs and dust bunnies for me. It also means re-evaluating where I am in pursuing the goals I have set aside for myself. I have a goal to finish a book I started years ago, to do another children's book for my grandchildren and to get some of my stories published. Problem is, I'm one of these people who like to have everything organized and in place before I feel I can treat myself to doing the things I most enjoy doing. For me that is writing. So I am making a concerted effort to set aside time just to write. I may have sixteen projects unfinished and in piles around me....a few dust bunnies in the corner.....and 200 e-mails waiting for answers...... but I am going to make myself do the one thing I know I want most to do and I will do it with gusto! I will do updates on my progress!

Gift From the Sea

At least once a year I like to revisit an old friend....a little book by Anne Morrow Lindbergh called "Gift From The Sea". It was originally written in 1955 but the principles are timeless and each rereading I find new truths. Every woman ought to read this book occasionally. It addresses the issues of multi-tasking and complicating our lives in a way that makes for a lot of introspection. Lindbergh says she wants "--to live "in grace" as much of the time as possible......an inner harmony, essentially spiritual, which can be translated into outward harmony." She talks about "how to remain whole in the midst of the distractions of life; how to remain balanced, no matter what centrifugal forces tend to pull one off center; how to remain stong, no matter what shocks come in at the periphery and tend to crack the hub of the wheel." I could go on and on quoting this tome but I hope I piqued your curiosity to buy it and read the whole thing! It is a book you will want to pass along to others who are special to you.

Spring Music

I have spent several days outside planting flowers; an activity that gives lots of opportunity to commune with nature. While kneeling down to put some starts into the soil I heard a familiar whizzing sound that I had been eagerly awaiting this Spring. I knew instantly what that sound meant. The hummingbirds are back. Dan and I love to watch the hummingbirds. We have two feeders full of nectar. One is attached to a window right beside Dans desk where he works on his computer writing and creating every day. He often has clients and associates sit in the big leather chair right next to that window. Only a couple feet away on the opposite side of the glass flit some of Gods most amazing creatures.........sailing to and from the tree to the feeder. The activity of those small creatures never ceases to amaze us and often entertains our guests.
In the past few days we have been watching a rose-breasted grosbeak and two Baltimore oriels at our feeders. The oriels are about 7-8 birds yet they eat from the hummingbird feeders. We were told these two varieties of birds are not native to this area but are only passing through on their way North for the summer. If we hadnt been in tune with our surroundings we would have missed seeing their beauty in our yard.
I wonder how often people miss Gods beauty right in their own surroundings because they dont take time to listen and observe. I am reminded of Ken Gires book Windows of the Soul. Gire has taught us both to look for God in art, in music, in movies, in nature and poetry and literature and yes, even in our work.
Tomorrow (May 7th) is Dans 60th birthday. We have been best friends for well over 40 years now. Where have the years gone? Perhaps it is because we are getting older that we recognize more the importance of listening and observing our surroundings. God is in abundance everywhere. We have never been more aware of that than since moving into our country home setting. We will take time tomorrow to walk together and perhaps go to the Frist Center For Fine Arts in Nashville. I know we will see God in many events of the day. Because we are looking for him all the time.....and listening.

My Home

I love our home place. We have lived here for almost seven years now and I plan to live here the rest of my life. We are creating memories here that will hopefully be enjoyed by our children and grandchildren long after we are gone. It is, by no means, a showplace or a mansion. In fact it is simply a modest 3000 sq. ft. farmhouse sitting on almost nine acres of land we have landscaped ourselves.

When we moved here we thanked God for allowing us the opportunity to Create a Haven of Peace...a refuge for family and friends and a retreat away from the hustle and stress of the world beyond our lane. We will always marvel at how many people tell us they breathe a sigh of relief when they drive down our lane and enter our property.

They tell us repeatedly how peaceful it is. Living here has taught us how rich is God's beauty all around us and how easily we can incorporate His beauty into making our home a showplace for his goodness and peace. When I started to write this blog entry I found it turned into a story of sorts. If you are interested in reading more click here...

My Gift to Dan

Almost five years ago I decided to take a drawing course titled 'Drawing From The Right Side of the Brain' taught by local artist Melanie Jackson (www.art-exchange.com - Art Search - melanie jackson). I had never been able to draw a discernible stick figure before the class and the first few sessions were taxing, to say the least. But I felt I needed something in my life that demanded discipline and would feed into my need to grow creatively.


My goal was not to become a great artist but to enhance my writing skills and other creative talents. I also felt this was something I could do to relieve stress and stretch myself. Now...years later...I have one of my pieces proudly displayed at our local library in an art show. My instructor has become my dear friend and humorously dubbed me 'The Best Artist Who Doesn't Know She Is An Artist!'

Drawing doesn't come easy for me. It is not a natural talent that I can just conjure up when I get in the mood. I have to work hard at it but when I get in that right brained ZONE, I can leave stress behind and enjoy making something of beauty to pass along to friends and family. I often make greeting and note cards from my drawings and enjoy sending out personalized notes different from the normal store-bought variety.

The art reception at the library was well attended by over 200 people. But what thrilled me was that four of the 48 Days coaches came to see my work. I was flattered that these coaches saw value in what I was doing and were eager to attend.

I had many people attend who knew I recently presented Dan with an original drawing of a collage I had put together representing two sides of his personality that I grew to love over 40 years ago. At that time he was driving a 1931 Model A Ford he had built from the ground up. It was souped up with a Chrysler Hemi engine, racing slicks on the back and chrome everywhere. Quite an impressive car and he used to scare the daylights out of me as I rode with him around the country roads in Ohio.

That car meant a lot to him and the fact that he built it as a high-performance vehicle seemed incongruous with the conservative country kid who grew up in the little Mennonite church his father pastored.

So I drew the car in the foreground and in the background I drew the church in which he spent most of his childhood. The drawing was a hit and hangs on the wall near his office door at home.

Here is a picture of the drawing for those of you who asked.

And below I've show a few more examples of what I have accomplished. Just about everyone I talk to says they can't draw and are sure they couldn't learn. Well, I am here to tell you that is a feeble excuse. If you have the desire and you learn the basics, you CAN draw. You may not become a Rembrandt or a Renoir but you will be surprised at how fast you will be able to draw or paint things you never dreamed you could. I encourage you to take a class if you feel the desire to learn. It could become an undiscovered talent you didn't know you had!

The Value of a Name

Last night I conducted a worship service at the Tennessee Prison for Women. I do this at least once or twice a month. It has become a highlight of my life. Those women bless me far more than I feel I give back to them. I learn a lot from the women in prison. One of the lessons I have learned recently is the importance of remembering their names. One young woman has a toddler who is being cared for by a loving couple while she completes her incarceration. I went up to this mother and called her by name and asked after her little boy. She looked at me with tears in her eyes and shock on her face. She put her hands on my arms and said "You remembered my NAME!" To see the astonishment in her face spoke volumes to me. To be remembered by name is a wonderful gift. That same evening another woman was crying and I went over to her and gave her a tissue and called her by name as I told her I had been praying for her. She smiled and thanked me. About a week later I got a letter from her telling me how blessed she was by my remembering her name when I had only met her once before...and that she would make a point to come to more of the worship services. Last night I had girls tell me repeatedly how impressed they were that I would remember their names. Such a small thing yet monumental to these women who have such horrible stories to tell of abuse, neglect, poverty and crime. It makes me weep to think how often just a simple gesture of kindness can make such a huge impact on the world. When I related to Dan how my evening went and the impact of this small gesture he gave me an old book off his shelves. I rolled my eyes (I'm good at that!) because I am reading about FOUR books right now and don't have time to read another thing! But he encouraged me to read just six short pages and I did so this morning. The book is Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. The section I read was on the importance of remembering and HONORING a person's name. Carnegie said "Most people don't remember names for the simple reason that they don't take the time and energy necessary to concentrate and repeat and fix names indelibly in their minds. They make excuses for themselves; they are too busy." Reading those few pages made me even more determined to implement this key rule of Mr. Carnegie's success principles: Remember that a man's name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

Where is the Smile?

I was recently shopping and rather enjoying myself with a smile on my face, a spring in my step and a good word for anyone I met along the way. After awhile, however, I began to notice how often I saw people who looked and acted as though a smile would be the last thing they wanted to do. This was especially true of the people who were getting paid to help me find, ring up, bag or carry out my purchases. These were the people whose job it was to make sure I would be a happy customer eager to return to their establishment.

I started thinking about how easy it would be for the clerk or salesperson to just look me in the eye and act like he/she was really happy to assist me in making my day a good one. Not so. Didn't happen very often.

Then I ate lunch in a little diner owned by a lady a few years older than I. You could tell she believed in Southern hospitality at its best. After my meal, which was served by a waitress who was smiling and attentive, the owner caught my eye as I headed for the exit. She hurriedly walked up to me, stretched out her hand to shake mine and asked me if I had enjoyed my experience in her establishment. I assured her I had and she went on to ask if I lived in the area and how long and we chatted a few minutes about how much we both love our little town of Franklin, TN. All the while this sweet lady had a huge smile on her face that would light up a room. You could tell it wasn't hard for her. She loved what she was doing and she wanted everyone who came into her place to have a memorable experience. Just for the record I have now been to this little restaurant three times and had a delightful experience each time. And I will return some more.......because I love to be around people who smile. Don't you? I love to be around people who want to provide an atmosphere of harmony and happiness. And I love good customer service.

On the rare occasion I actually have a sales clerk ask me how my day is going I always ask them the same. Often they are surprised by that. They don't expect to have someone else....particularly a stranger....care what their day is like. But the sad thing is that very often the response I get is "I'll be better in an hour when I can go home!" or "I'm so tired. I just wanna get outta here!"

When did sales training go by the wayside? When did store owners decide they just needed a warm body to cover the registers and forgot to emphasize they expect and DEMAND good customer service? And, more basically, when did people get so disrespectful that they no longer feel it necessary to smile and be polite???

Perhaps it stems from a lack of poor upbringing......a poor self-image......a sad or abused life......any number of possibilities. But I suspect that if store owners demanded good customer service, smiling employees with a spring in their step .........things would change. People would find themselves out on the street for lack of proper work skills.

Rather sad, really. All it takes is a smile and a good attitude to make someone's day. And the irony is that even if a person is forcing themselves to be jovial and polite.....it has a magical way of transforming one into a happier person inside. It just works that way. So everyone wins. I hope you are smiling as you read this.....and that you will work hard at projecting that smile to everyone you come in contact with today!

Joanne F. Miller
June, 2007

My Gift To You

My husband uses a story called Acres of Diamonds to illustrate that in our quest for life direction, the answers we seek are often right under our noses. The answers we need are so simple that we fail to see the obvious because we are so mired down in sifting through the trivia and minutia of everyday life. We make the process inordinately difficult and think it too complex to muddle through on our own. We need someone to tell us what to do. Christians pray about it......sometimes for days, weeks or years.....waiting for an answer and frequently doing nothing to act upon what God puts right before them because it might not be specific enough or obvious enough to them.

I believe that our inner passions are a gift from God. Without passion and joy I am destined to lead a dull, boring and mediocre life. But when I tap into what truly makes me happy and at peace I can feel assured that I am "hearing" God say, "THIS is my GIFT to you! You need look no further." God opens windows of opportunity for me to determine His will and desires for me every day of my life. If I but open my eyes to see......

The irony of this philosophy of life is that often people feel if they really enjoy what they are doing, are passionate about it, then they question the validity of their efforts. Could something that makes me feel this good, this fulfilled, truly be God's calling on my life? Shouldn't my work be more tedious? More drudgery, less joyful? It doesn't make sense to me that God would reserve joy and passion for seemingly insignificant and trivial life experiences. Is He not great enough to include vocation and life's work in providing fulfillment and peace? I have felt no better harmony and joy in my life than fulfilling God's calling to be a nurturing parent to two amazing children of the Kingdom. It's the most incredible career I can imagine........

The difficulty in determining life's direction or calling lies primarily within our own life experience. We can usually trace back through our past to determine what our future course should be. The novelist, Graham Green (The Power and the Glory) once said, "There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in." This is a simple premise, thus not often taken seriously. We inadvertently want to make the process so much more difficult than necessary.

I have always loved the written word. Books have always been my friends. My mother relates how I loved to be read to as a toddler and how amazed she was the day when I began to read the words myself at a very early age. When I was eight years old my mother started college. In that era, a single parent of three small children attending classes was an unusual sight on a college campus. We lived right on campus and had the benefit of the library within walking distance of our home. To me, this was Heaven. I visited the library several times a week and became so fascinated by what my Mother was learning through books that I read the same books she did. We often had discussions and debates about the books she was required to read for her literature classes. This was the background laid for my lifelong love of reading and writing.

The written word for me is more than the knowledge within the pages of a book. Reading has been an integral part of my passion but the actual act of putting words to paper has gone hand-in-hand with my intrigue. I love to write. As a child, I enjoyed writing reports for classes. The research interested me, yes, but the actual penning of my thoughts and ideas was more than a casual assignment to me. It was art. The flow of pen across crisp white paper has always held a fascination for me. Occasionally I would write childish poems and stories which evolved into a true love affair with the written word and penmanship.

I have spent countless hours putting pen to paper writing letters to family and friends who simply needed a kind personal word of encouragement and hope. As a young adult I took on the responsibility of creating and writing a church newsletter, then later a business newsletter for clients.

I relate all this to illustrate how these windows of experience in my life have been windows that have been God's inaudible voice to me saying, "This is how you are wonderfully made. THIS is my GIFT to you!"

These windows have given me broad hints about who I am and what is my calling. Theologian and author, Frederick Buechner, once said in a graduation address, "The voice we should listen to most as we choose a vocation is the voice of our own gladness. What can we do that makes us the gladdest, what can we do that leaves us with the strongest sense of sailing true north and of peace, which is much of what gladness is? Is it making things with our hands out of wood or stone or paint or canvas? Or is it making something we hope like truth out of words? Or is it making people laugh or weep in a way that cleanses their spirit? I believe that if it is a thing that makes us truly glad, then it is a good thing and it is our thing and it is the calling voice that we were made to answer with our lives."

"The calling voice......" What an amazing statement. The trouble is we don't recognize the importance of these windows, this voice in our lives. We don't validate them. They seem too trivial in the complexity of our everyday lives. But, in reality, they are showing you something of who you are, what you love, and what you should be doing with your life if you just listen and recognize the patterns.

Our lives may take many paths that seem to be scattered and unrelated. But if examined are often connected by windows of God's gift to us. Life experience, education, relationships, spirituality....all shape our lives but in and out are woven glimpses of our futures; and times of joy and peace and fulfillment. The patterns that are revealed to us if we simply take the time to bring them into the present.

Ken Gire, in his incredible book Windows of the Soul, relates a prayer for JOY that has greatly impacted me. Perhaps it speaks to anyone seeking God's calling and not "hearing" His voice:

A Prayer For Joy
Help me, O God,
to listen to what it is that makes my heart glad
and to follow where it leads.
May joy, not guilt,
Your voice, not the voices of others,
Your will, not my willfulness,
be the guides that lead me to my vocation.
Help me to unearth the passions of my heart
that lay buried in my youth.
And help me to go over that ground again and again
until I can hold in my hands,
hold and treasure,
Your calling on my life....


Joanne F. Miller

God Gives Us the Tools

Today Dan and our son, Jared (just home from Rwanda), left to take a road trip to Ohio. Dan is to be the featured speaker at a special ceremony honoring the Founders of Camp Buckeye...the camp for inner-city kids his brother and several others founded in 1984. (www.campbuckeye.org).

Through the years Camp Buckeye has held a lot of memories for our three now- grown kids. All of them attended Back-to-Basics camp most summers from the time they were 8 yrs. old till they outgrew camper age and then each of them had stints as camp counselors. I still chuckle over the year we received a post-card from Jared saying he had gotten very ill and was up all night throwing up. His childish handwriting exclaimed he had "pucked" 14 times that night and his sweet cousin SaraLisa had held him close to comfort him through the ordeal. Several years in a row I went to camp myself to help in the kitchen cooking for all the little tykes and gaining new friendships with many of the Amish and Mennonite cooks and volunteers. I still have some great recipes from those years.

*Here is a picture of Dan, myself, and Dan's brother Nate...at a cabin at the camp, that Dan helped build with other volunteers)

This morning as I read over Dan's speech he will be presenting tomorrow night I was struck by a spiritual insight that resonated truth to me and I wanted to share it with readers.

Dan was expounding on his usual theme of pursuing dreams in spite of obstacles, and having a clear plan of action. To quote from his notes:
"There is a spiritual life lesson for all of us to gain from seeing what happened here in this process. Yes, we can have dreams - yes, those dreams may come into view - but it requires a clear plan of action. It requires imagination. It requires desire, hard work, self-discipline and faith."

The ancient Jewish church had a prayer that they would recite at Passover that describes how this works: "I thank you Lord God, King of the universe, for this bread; which you have created and human hands have prepared; it shall be for us the body of Christ."
That prayer reveals a profound spiritual principle: God's gifts are raw materials, not finished products. Think about the most revered sacrament in the church - Holy Communion. Does God give us bread and wine? Where can you find those in nature? You can't. God makes wheat, He doesn't make bread. He makes grapes - not wine. But when we take the raw materials God gives us, we can add our work and give them back to him as an offering."

Now to me that is pretty profound. Giving praise, compliments and encouragement to people who have worked hard to do an outstanding job with a concept, business, act of kindness, etc. is something I make a habit of doing. I find a little encouragement goes a long way to propel others to higher levels of success. But I cringe inside when my efforts to praise someone for their efforts is brushed off with a comment like, "Oh, it's all God. I had nothing to do with it!"...

Yikes! I want to respond with "Oh, are you a robot? Were you in a coma and God just made you do miraculous things and you took absolutely no part??"

Come on! I believe in being humble but I also believe in using my brain to recognize that God gives me the dream, the insight in how to fulfill that dream and then to ability to work the plan! He gives me the tools but He sure expects me to break a good sweat over the work involved. And it is in that process of working hard to achieve what God has ultimately lain on my heart that gives me incredible fulfillment. I'm not a puppet or a robot just sitting around waiting for something or someone to pull my strings or flip my switch. On the contrary, I am a Child of God working daily to live in His will and fulfill the Plans He has for my life...working hard to use the raw tools He has given me to fulfill my dreams and goals.
I have a plaque on my office wall that I have had for probably 20 years or more. It says "You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true". It is a quote from Richard Bach. Now don't go jumping on your Christian high horse labeling me "New Age". I have no delusions that I alone have the power to make my life a success without the guidance of my Heavenly Father and without His blessing. I believe adamantly that one should live his/her life as if it is a prayer to God. And if I am in constant communion with God I also feel confident that He is leading me to dream big dreams and giving me the tools I need to bring them to fruition. And I am equally confident that He expects me to work hard to get to my goal.

So, next time someone praises you for something you have accomplished, whisper a prayer of thanks to your Heavenly Father for allowing you to accomplish something of value. By exclaiming you had nothing to do with it, you are forgetting that God thought you important enough to plant a seed of desire, help you bring it to fruition and now He is smiling at you for having understood the Plan He had in mind. You are pretty important to Him. Wow! Pretty incredible when you think about it!

I Need Therapy!

Ok....so here is the conversation Dan and I had over lunch today.....at a Mexican restaurant, of course (I am convinced there is a Mexican gene in him somewhere.....could it be a Mexican Mennonite???)
"Daniel, if we would just go away to England for a few months I would be able to write tons of stuff and be so excited about it!"
To which he replied, "Why can you not do that here?"
To which I replied, "I always feel like I have to have all my ducks in a row and have everything finished and organized and THAT never happens so I never get to the one thing I love to do most."
"No, you do not." He said with a smirk on his face. (I hate it when that happens!)
I knew what he was referring to.....he was implying that if I REALLY wanted to write, I would make it the highest priority and just do it.
At that point, I admit I got a little over-dramatic. (I tend to do that to make a point!) "Yes, I DO! Writing is what I REALLY want to do but I get so obsessed with having to get organized that I dont feel I deserve to take the time to do the exciting thing I want to do most."
"So what is holding you back?" he said.
"My LIFE!" I said as I threw my hands in the air! (Again, a bit over dramatic but it is the way I have to express myself!)
I looked at him as he sat there, smirking, and waiting for me to see my own idiocy. "Ok.....so I need therapy!" I said and that is when he began to give me examples of how people block out time to devote to the things they do want to accomplish most. He talked about a coach who just wrote about taking ten minutes a day to organize an area of the house....to which, I had the opportunity to smirk!
TEN MINUTES A DAY? Here is an example of my life. I went to the back bathroom this morning to throw in a load of laundry, I picked up a cloth napkin from the dinner we had a couple nights ago and out fell a spoon. So I picked up the spoon and laid it on the sink and remembered I had to clean the toilet and straighten up that bathroom since we are having company for dinner again tonight. I proceeded to clean that bathroom and as I started out the door I spotted the spoon. On my way to the kitchen to put it in the dishwasher, I passed my office door and spotted the basket of 98 envelopes I had stuffed the night before. I knew they needed to go to the post office so I went in to pick it up and take it to the kitchen counter since I was going that way. But as I was picking it up I spied a few interesting looking emails on my computer so I set the spoon down and sat down to answer a couple. As I got up from my desk about twenty minutes later, I spied the spoon again, picked it up along with the basket of envelopes to be mailed and went into our bathroom which connects from my office to the master bedroom and saw that the throw rugs needed to be shaken so I laid the spoon down on the counter and did that little job. Then I noticed the toilet needed cleaning so I did that and a couple other little jobs. As I passed through the door to the bedroom, I picked up the spoon and saw a pile of clean laundry I had placed on the bed that needed to be put away. I laid the spoon on the high-boy and straightened up the bedroom. While sorting through the pile of clothes I laid out items I need to pack for our trip to New York City tomorrow. As I started to leave the bedroom I remembered the spoon and went to retrieve it. As I came out the bedroom door I noticed the CD player in the living room had stopped and I missed hearing the sounds of Andrea Bocceli that I had been listening to. So I laid the spoon on the fireplace mantle and went to put in another CD. At that point I finally picked up the spoon and took it to the kitchen. At least an hour had passed since I found that stupid spoon!
Can anyone RELATE?? Has anyone else besides me taken such a circuitous route to get from point A to point B?? THIS IS MY LIFE! Some days I wonder how I will ever get to my writing. I can ALWAYS get sidetracked and find things that just HAVE to be done.
So I think I need therapy. Or a trip to England. Or both! One thing for sure, my life gives me lots of fodder to write about........if I only had the TIME!!

Pajama Man

I stood at the periphery of the marble counter in the grand hotel in New York City while Dan checked us out. As I am fond of doing, I was watching people. I spotted a nice looking middle-aged woman waiting in line to check in and she was chuckling openly and caught my eye. As she laughed, her eyes beaconed me to follow hers to see what so amused her. Funny how you can be given instructions simply by looking into someones eyes. So I took the bait and turned slightly to my right to see a man, probably in his early 70s, stately looking and headed with a mission to the bank of elevators ahead. He had walked in from the outer doors, obviously having been for a stroll. A common occurrence in the Big Apple, but usually one is dressed more appropriately.....not in fuzzy slippers, cotton pajamas and a terry bathrobe! The lady looked at me like she was sharing a private joke and we both laughed and winked at each other.
As Dan completed his transaction and we walked towards the outer door together I scooted over to the "lady of laughter" and exchanged a few remarks about the scene we had witnessed together. It went like this:
"That guy has no inhibitions, does he?!" I said as we both laughed.
To which she replied, "You know, I admire him! It does not bother him one bit what people think about him! I look forward to getting to that stage in life and I am not far off!"
As I shook my head in affirmation, I said, "I am getting close too and it feels good! Bless him!" And Dan and I took off out the door to grab our taxi to the airport. But I continued to think about the Pajama Man all day.
The next evening I had a conversation by phone with my daughter-in-law, Teri. I talked to her about how much easier life gets in this season of life compared to all that she is dealing with in raising five small children, home schooling three, cleaning, mountains of laundry, a husband working from home, meals to fix, diapers to change and ............lions and tigers and bears, Oh, my!! She, too, said she looks forward to that time of comfortable freedom although she recognizes that she is now laying the groundwork that will make that season the best it can be. So true!
There is definitely a freedom from the bondage of "image" that comes with age and life experience. There is a grace and sense of being comfortable with oneself that simply takes years to attain. It is too bad really. If we could just come into that age and comfort in our twenties we would save ourselves so much grief! Yet, does it not take a certain measure of character development through the maze of lifes twists and turns to reach that goal? I suppose it does.
I am so glad I no longer have to work so hard to make sure I make the right impression on the world at large. I am so thankful I am past the stage where I have to have my "face" on every time I walk out the door of my own home.....so I do not embarrass myself by scaring someone I know! If I stumble in public, I can laugh and chalk it up to my age rather than feeling stupid and inadequate. If I am not able to squeeze myself into a size 6 anymore, I can join a fitness regimen that caters largely to fat, old grandmothers like me and laugh with them while toning up my ample rolls and bulges and reminiscing about all the great food and fun I have had putting on all those extra pounds.
I guess I have finally given myself permission to just be me. To enjoy life and to recognize that if I have not yet earned the respect and love of those around me for who I am, then maybe I just need new friends!
Yes, there are definite advantages to growing old. It took me awhile to discover them. But I sure do admire the Pajama Man and that experience made me even more excited about the years to come!
So if one day you see me walking down the streets of Franklin in my nightgown, robe and fuzzy slippers, just wave at me, smile and know I have finally arrived!

Our Day Trip

I woke this morning in a fog. I have had several days in a row that were physically and emotionally exhausting. It was a good week...good exhaustion...but I truly felt my brain was in a fog this morning and I just couldn't get my act together. So Dan and I decided to take one of our day trips just scouting out new territory. He got a GPS this week and since the weather was glorious we thought this would be a good day to try it out. So he stuck the thing in his old Trooper and we headed south...armed with camera and an atlas in case we couldn't figure out this new technology.

We decided to go to Lynchburg. Neither of us had been there before but we have heard a lot about Miss Mary Bobo's restaurant and the Jack Daniel's Distillery. We don't like to drink the stuff but the place sounded interesting and it was a destination we could program into the GPS and have fun viewing the Fall foliage along the way.

It turned out to be an incredible adventure. First off, you sure don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out the GPS. It was awesome! We figured we could probably have added at least two years to our lives if we had gotten one of these ages ago instead of wandering around looking for places we couldn't find! Just a few weeks ago, Jared and I got off four different exits looking for a Starbucks while traveling home from Hilton Head. Never did find one! But with this little baby, we can now program in Starbucks and VOILA! We not only have the directions but a voice tells us when to turn and how much farther it is.

Speaking of the voice...we were tooling down the road shortly after leaving the house and this loud female voice shouts out "TURN LEFT IN TWO-TENTHS OF A MILE". I about threw the directions booklet up in the air. Scared me to death. Pretty soon I was playing with the languages and had our girl speaking with a pretty British accent. We have decided to name her "Elora", a name that seemed to fit her and is a favorite of mine from an old movie. I also learned how to turn her voice down a bit so it didn't blast us out each time.

Now Dan had fun all day playing head games with Elora. I expected any minute for her to scream "Make up your bloody mind!" because he did yet another U-turn or we saw something interesting we had to turn around to check out... You see that is what our day trips are for...exploring, relaxing, seeing beautiful scenery, watching for wildlife, hitting the garage sales and flea markets, talking about ideas and laughing together. No worries, no phones, no messages, no one pulling at us......just relaxing. I needed that today and I must have thanked Dan a dozen times for realizing it!

Now this was not an expensive day. It wasn't luxurious. It cost us a cheap lunch at an out-of-the-way diner and a Sonic chocolate malt and a few bucks at a gift store where I bought a small Christmas present. But it was as wonderful a getaway as if we had planned a cruise for a day. The trees are getting more and more colorful and the weather couldn't have been more perfect. We took beautiful country roads with twists and turns and deer and cattle and horses and hawks and lots of wildlife everywhere. So calming to the spirit and balm to the soul.

Lynchburg was fun but in reality it was just a destination. It's the adventures along the way that make a day like today glorious. We walked through historic Lynchburg, in and out of a few little shops. We sat on a bench in the square and drank icy cold apple cider. We talked uninterrupted. We laughed at each other. We had fun oohing and ahhing over the new GPS (That thing is AMAZING!) and we got some ideas from looking at homes and landscaping that we want to incorporate at our place.

It doesn't take a lot of money or blocking out a week of work and responsibilities to get refreshed and rejuvenated. And taking a leisurely ride through the country to see the beauty around us does wonders to help one be reminded of the many blessings we have right under our nose if we just open our eyes to see. God gave us an incredible landscape in Tennessee and I am sure each person reading this can say the same about their own neck of the woods. When was the last time you drank it all in? I promise it will be as refreshing as a cool glass of apple cider in Autumn!

If We Only Look Around Us...

I have written before that a dear friend gave us Ken Gire's Windows of the Soul as a gift for Christmas, 2001. I will be eternally grateful to her for this gift for I am not the only person I know who feels this book should be sitting right beside your Bible and read frequently to remind us of the beauty all around us. It is right there...right in front of us...but just as we often fail to really "listen" to God and to our fellow man...we often fail to "see" God in the seemingly ordinary and mundane. We are simply too busy, too self-absorbed, too unconcerned...and often just too jaded, cynical or preoccupied with the evil around us.

This weekend I spent three days in a beautiful vacation home in the mountains with four dear friends. It was a planning weekend for the board members of a Christian women's organization I have been part of for about eleven years. This is the third year I have gone to this retreat weekend in the mountains. Each year I am vividly reminded of God's beauty and how easily I can get caught up in just being too busy and too preoccupied that I miss what God has put before me every day.

I think it is important to take a moment for retreat every so often. It doesnt have to be costly. It can simply be a walk in the woods. Dan and I did that just last night when I returned home from this trip. We simply walked side-by-side on our walking trails through the woods talking about the joy we find just seeing what is around us. Planning out how we can create more beauty and peace on our own property.

The leaves in the mountains were amazing this weekend. I marveled at the beauty. I took pictures; I picked up leaves to bring home to press for yet another project I want to create. I laughed with friends. We wandered through a country cemetery and read headstones while conjuring up stories we felt seemed appropriate for the long ago departed. We picked up moss-covered rocks and tree bark and considered how they could be used in creating more beauty in our own yards. One of our ladies finds joy in making flower arrangements and is quite talented. She picked up vines, pine boughs, twigs of bright yellow, orange and red leaves and tall grasses and made a beautiful arrangement when we got back to the house. Didnt cost a nickel but looked like a million bucks and blessed our souls. Another friend and I wandered through an abandoned house we thought would make a darling get-away cottage and we pondered the idea of checking into it further. "Making a silk purse out of a sow's ear" as my mother used to say. Our imaginations took us away.

Van Gogh said, "All nature seems to speak. As for me, I cannot understand why everybody does not see it or feel it; nature or God does it for everyone who has eyes and ears and a heart to understand." Ken Gire goes on to say, "In our search for God, Nature is one of the places we look and one of the places He looks for us, reaches to us. If, indeed, Nature is one of the cognate languages of God, it seems only logical it would be one of the languages we should study."

This weekend I "studied" Nature and found God in every nook and cranny. When we are searching for Him actively, we find Him in everything around us. When we are constantly being wary of evil, we find evil all around us. Perhaps it is like finding the glass half empty or half full. I choose to search out beauty and I find it in abundance. I hope you do too!

God's words are underneath everything. And if you listen carefully, you will hear them. Ken Gire, Windows of the Soul (Zondervan, 1996)


Joanne F. Miller
November 19, 2007

Reflecting

On Easter Sunday of this year...March 23rd, 2008...Daniel and I will celebrate 40 years of marriage. I was 17 and he was 19 when we met on campus at OSU. We were kids who grew up together. It didn't take us long to find we were meant for each other and all these years later, we marvel at the perfection of this marriage that God put together. We came from different worlds. We jest that he was Mennonite and I was Heathen. But God saw something we needed from one another and the following years have been a testimony to His sense of humor, His blessing and His Love.

I cringe when I hear married friends talk about how difficult is marriage. I have never really felt marriage is any more difficult than life itself. There are ups and downs, hills and valleys, disappointments and trials...but I can't imagine not having my soul mate and true love beside me through each and every day. The Jerry McGuire cheesy quote that so many make fun of truly describes our feelings for one another..."You complete me." Isn't that what a marriage is all about? It's like a puzzle that when the pieces are all put together it completes the picture. He doesn't take away from who I am; he enhances my life to make me a better person.

I recently had a young man ask me what is the secret to 40 years of happy married life. I can tell you it is not settling for mediocrity. It is not just enduring. It is not just fulfilling a commitment. I can tell you it is all about unselfishness. It is all about loving someone enough to practice being kind rather than right. It is all about respect and encouragement and support. It is all about wanting to make the other person shine!

And in so doing, we make an incredible team. And in so doing, we have had a wonderfully happy and productive 40 years together. And yes, it has taken work. It doesn't just happen on its own. Left to itself anything deteriorates. We made a conscious decision that working on our marriage was tantamount to the success of our children and our businesses. We have made our relationship high priority for over 40 years and we still work on it every day.

I want to share an example of love in action. Even after 40 years.

Recently I was spending an evening at the Tennessee Prison for Women conducting a worship service. When I got home late, Dan was in bed listening to me chatter about the inmates while I undressed and wound down for the day. I put on my robe and looked on my side of the bed for my old slippers. Not there. I looked in the bathroom, all the while filling Dan in on how the evening had gone. Slippers not there. So I went back to my closet and still couldn't find them. But over to the side was a pretty pair of brand new pink slippers. I picked them up and asked "Whose are these?" thinking maybe my daughter Ashley had left slippers at our house since we both wear about the same size. At first Dan tried to act like he didn't know but I can read him like a book. After all I have had a lot of years of experience! As he began to smile I asked, "Why did you get these for me? And how did you even know I needed them? And when did you get them???" He said he had seen my old slippers in the bathroom that morning and saw how worn out they were (hey, they were comfortable!!) and thought there was no need for me to wear something that shabby. So while I was at the prison, he went shopping (something he RARELY does) and not only bought me new slippers but he bought the right size, the right color and the right style.

That seemingly small incident said volumes to me.

It told me that after 40 years, he still loves me enough to care about my needs and happiness. It told me I was important enough to him to go shopping, something he detests. And it told me he is in tune enough to know my size and my style preference.

It told me most of all that he loves me. Still. After 40 years, three kids and 6.5 grandkids. In spite of bulges, wrinkles, grey hairs and aches and pains of age. It told me I have had an amazing adventure for 40 years and I have many more years of great adventures ahead. I am looking forward to it. And more importantly I am looking forward to sharing every adventure with the love of my life! Happy Anniversary, Daniel!

March 19, 2008

Just Another Day in Paradise

Just Another Day in Paradise!
Joanne F. Miller

Ok...I am soaked through to my underclothes and am waiting for the next disaster to happen. I actually woke up with a start this morning remembering that I have to be at the prison tonight and Daniel has to be at Nashville Choir dress rehearsal for a performance on Sunday. Both of us will be a long way from home and I have a lady coming at 8:30 PM to pick up my sofa I sold on Craig's List yesterday. She can't come another time. She has rented a U-Haul and has to have it back in the morning. Can't pick it up till around 7:30 tonight. We'll both be gone by then.

So.....THAT'S an opportunity for a solution......meaning I finally decided the best bet is for me to drive separately and come straight home when I finish with the worship service at 8:00 instead of going out eating afterwards and discussing the events of the time there as we usually do. Not sure WHEN I will eat any dinner since the lady will be here when I get home and wants to talk to me about prison ministry......I leave the house about 4. Guess I'll eat a big lunch. Ok...that problem solved.......

Ashley instant messages me to see if I can go to Curves with her and Dad watch Clara for an hour. Mmmmm........no go. Much as I'd like to, Dad has a client coming from 9-11 AM but I can watch her. Can't go this morning myself because I am waiting for the delivery from Haverty's of our new furniture. But I do put on my brand new bright red Curves T-Shirt in case I do get a chance to go sometime today......which is looking doubtful. And the shirt is wet now too. I'm getting to that part. I go attend to the laundry, take Dan his tea and morning muffin.

So Ashley and Clara come and Clara's fussy so when Ashley leaves I put Clara in the walker, give her some baby snacks (food solves any problem, you know) and pop in a Barney video to amuse her. She seems happy for the moment.

I hear a familiar beep from my computer. Autumn, my 11-yr-old granddaughter wants my attention to chat awhile through instant messaging. Mmmmm.....ok...I can handle several things at once. I am finishing up getting envelopes ready to go out with thank you letters for donations to our son, Jared's, ministry in Africa. I am also printing off pictures of the art show my art teacher was in last weekend so I can take them to her when I go to class on Monday. Autumn wants me to take pictures of Clara so she can see her.....Autumn's in Colorado. So I do that...take three pictures and put them into the computer and send them to her.

Meanwhile the phone rings and the delivery truck.....an 18-wheeler....is here. The guy says the lane is awfully narrow. I assure him trucks make deliveries here all the time. It is ok. But I need to scarf up Clara and run back to the converted barn we call the Sanctuary to orchestrate where to put things in Dan's new office. He is with clients so he can't do this himself......or help me out....... It's raining. Hard. Very hard. And no umbrella in the closet. Of course. So....Clara and I run in the hard rain to the car to get the umbrella and then run to the Sanctuary. I get halfway there and realize there is no truck there....and I hear beep-beep-beep......a truck backing down the WRONG drive. We GAVE them explicit directions to the drive to the Sanctuary. No trees. No fences. Just easy access. I am dripping wet at the door of the Sanctuary. Jace (who does our order processing) looks up at the panic on my face and grabs for Clara and I say....."Take her, please! I'll be back in a minute! I've got to avert these guys!" I run back to the house FAST...to try to stop them. I try to call on their cell phone. No answer. I am about to have a heart attack. It's hard for a fat lady to run in the rain. It was pouring. I'm wet, wet, wet.....and winded. I run to the lane. The truck is slowly inching its way.....backing in.....an 18 wheeler......with one guy trying to direct another. They are three quarters of the way in.
I talk to them.....they have two choices. Finish backing in SLOWLY around one more big tree.........or pulling ahead and going to where they were SUPPOSED to go to avoid tearing up our trees and causing undue frustration. Neither is a very good option where the trees are concerned. They decide to keep backing up. I hear a crunch. Ohhhhh.....our poor trees. This is too much. I am dying here. Not sure if it is frustration or from the fat-lady run. Probably both.

I'm wondering what Jace is doing to console a screaming baby. I call Ashley. She is on her way home. Praise God! I tell her to go straight to the Sanctuary to get Clara. The guys pull up to the deck to start unloading.

They can't get the back door open. At all. No dice. Not gonna happen. They try and try. I get tired of standing in the rain waiting and I go inside and scour the kitchen sink so I can watch out the window. I see them taking pictures of the top of the truck with a phone camera. Ashley comes in to see whats happening. One guy finally comes to the door and says they have to go back to headquarters......a long way off.......and may or may not be back today. May have to reschedule.

I'm keeping my cool, here. The trees which they were NOT supposed to have encountered messed up the top of the truck. The door is off the track. Would not have happened had they followed directions. GRRRRR......I politely accept that there isn't much I can do so off they go. Out the lane they were supposed to have come down the first time. And I'm standing there with no delivery, soaked to the bone and a nice big white bleach spot on my new red t-shirt. Well, now.....it's just another day in Paradise, right? Anyone relate? I don't want to go look to see what damage was done down our pretty lane of trees and fence line. Do you think if I don't look, it'll all go away??? I think I'll be like Scarlett O'Hara....I'll think about it tomorrow!

The Puzzle of Life

I find that hardly a day goes by that I don't tell someone I will forward them my story The Puzzle of Life. I wrote it almost a year ago and when I sat down to put pencil to paper the words flowed so swiftly and eloquently that I felt as if God was holding my pencil. I love it when my writing flows like that. I know it is anointed and that I am working in my gift in a way that leaves me energized and feeling very blessed. Today I again found the need to pass this story on to several friends and thought it was about time to add it to my blog. I often send this to people when they ask why Dan and I are so happy and seem so at peace with ourselves and with life. The fact that both of us are sixtyish......well, hindsight is always 20/20. We can look back on a big portion of our lives and see how all the ups and downs and trials fit together to make us who we are today. The people we have met along the way, the grief, the fears, the celebrations, the joy, the poor decisions and their consequences.......all of it has been used in some form or fashion to complete the puzzle of our lives. The puzzle is not complete. Hopefully it will hold yet many more pieces. But one sure thing is that we have learned the people and the events and the opportunities we have encountered have miraculously fit pieces into our respective puzzles that help to complete the story of our lives in just the way God intended. I hope you will enjoy my writing and be encouraged to look at each encounter with people and with events in your life in new light. You are putting together your own puzzle.

The Puzzle of Life

Life is complicated to be sure. Julia Cameron, in her best selling book The Artist's Way, talks about synchronicity. Some call it coincidence or serendipity or luck. Cameron says, "We call it anything but what it is -- the hand of God, or good, activated by our own hand when we act in behalf of our truest dreams, when we commit to our own soul." (The Artist's Way, Tarcher/Putnam, 1992 by Julia Cameron, pg 64)
I believe our faith should be acted upon. Our lives don't just evolve without our active participation. God ordains and we have the responsibility to fulfill His Plan for us. In light of this philosophy, I like to think my life is much like a giant and intricate jigsaw puzzle and all the zillions of tiny pieces fit together in a way that, bit-by-bit makes sense. Sometimes a huge pattern of pieces fits together almost miraculously and it makes sense that each piece has to be there to form that section. One small piece can't be left out or the patterns don't go together properly.
Some of the pieces are crazy-- vague and seemingly void of clues as to where they might fit in but, given time and patience, those pieces will become intricate links to connect the other pieces together. No piece can be left out and no piece is insignificant.
There are cornerstone pieces to the puzzle -- pivotal points in life -- birth and childhood, adolescence and coming of age, marriage and/or career, old age and death -- the four corners of the puzzle. The outer frame between those corners are all the pivotal events that connect those four pillars, the necessary pieces that make us human beings with complicated, involved steps to maturity and aging. The four corners are the hinges to the doorways which open to all the stages of our lives.
It's beautiful if you look at life this way. It makes sense. We need all the pieces in the middle to help us learn and grow and cope and survive. Those inner pieces make up our inner being. We are complex. We need each piece of the puzzle to connect to the next piece. If we leave out a piece here and there we miss important steps in putting our lives together. There is a spiritual and physical balance that is necessary to connect all the parts.
Sometimes we get on a roll and all the puzzle pieces fit together really well in one section and we know we have "listened" to our Creator, our directive, well. We have shunned discouragement and anger and frustration and defeat and forged on till we made the right choices and placed the pieces in proper sequence and now it all makes sense. What a wonderful feeling to look at that section of the puzzle with delight and know that perseverance and dedication and keeping your eyes on the goal have paid off in the beauty of a well-developing puzzle picture so beautiful that it is obvious it is divinely ordained.
Now that section is complete; it is time to conquer another, then another..........until one day we will look at the puzzle and see clarity of picture that we could have never dreamed would appear. We think back on how those pieces fit together and are amazed at the intricacy and all the events, people and experiences that went into the making of this divine creation......one solitary life......